Zelman Meats: Veggie’s stay away

2 St Anne’s Ct, W1F 0AZ

When a restaurant’s strap line is ‘We just cook Beef, that’s all we do’ its pretty clear what to expect…

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And we could not have been more delighted at the prospect of an evening full of beef…

In London you can pay an arm and a leg for a decent (and sometimes not so decent) steak so when we suggested checking out Zelman Meats we were straight away hit with the question – ‘but is it going to cost a shit load?’

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At Zelman Meats the answer is no!

The space itself has seen several restaurants settle in before closing shop and moving off in the last couple of years – A tapas joint, New York Deli and most recently a particular favourite of ours Rex & Mariano which sadly shut its doors due to London’s lack of want for all things fishy.

So back in November we bade farewell to Rex & Mariano, and hello to Zelman Meats! And from the looks of things the new meat-heavy restaurant was definitely settling into its Soho neighbourhood well – the joint was in full swing…

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Now if you are having a steak supper there is only one drink to order – Red Wine!

Which we ordered by the litre…no jokes! How blissful to be free of Dry January – the most boring decision we’ve made in 2016!

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Now  – not all the starters are beef-based – seeing the baked oysters featuring the Ribman’s ‘Holy Fuck’ sauce we had to get a round of these rocks in.

Having never tried baked oysters before it was difficult to imagine what to expect  – we have to say we are definitely more partial to the more slippery, raw variety but baked with a dousing of the Ribman’s infamous hot sauce were very pleasant.

Do not fear – the heat is definitely one which can be universally handled – we could have even done with a bit more!

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Just in case we weren’t going to be consuming enough beef during the evening we also ordered the Bresaola and mozzarella topped ciabatta – a squeeze of lemon bought the dish together – not sure whether this is a sign we need to switch to Sensodyne toothpaste but the mozzarella was served so cold it almost made our teeth tingle, so cold that you couldn’t taste any creaminess of the cheese at all .

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But who give a monkeys about the taste of the mozzarella when you are at a steak restaurant –  I mean seriously – we’d come here for one thing and one thing only.

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Steak – baby!

Chez Zelman Meats there is a narrow selection when it comes to which cut you can choose from – dinners are encouraged to order a steak smorgasbord with a bit of each cut – Sliced Picanha, Chateaubriand and Smoked Short Ribs.

We made the executive decision to order all three…

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For the sides we opted for the grilled Portobello mushrooms and the Black truffle and parmesan chips…

The mushrooms weren’t the most photogenic but they tasted mighty fine – be warned they do contain lots of garlic, but we aren’t complaining!

You know our thoughts about a truffle and parmesan combo – unbeatable – so these chips were heaven, Zelman’s don’t scrimp on the truffle either.

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You can choose from a selection of sauces too – Béarnaise, Chimichurri and BBQ.

Giving the BBQ a miss the béarnaise was fantastic and was a perfect sauce for dunking both chips and meat, the Chimichurri was a bit hit and miss, lacking depth we didn’t end up slathering our meal in this one.

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Each cut of meat was incredibly different – the Chateaubriand was so velvety and tender you hardly felt the need to chew, the short ribs were smoky with a deep meaty flavour having been smoked for 12 hours and glazed and glazed again, whilst the Picanha was the tougher of the three with a thin layer of fat running down the length of the cut.

But which cut was the winner? The steaks have never been higher – we’d have to say the Chateaubriand just beat them all!

We’ve got to also mention our fantastic waiter Matteo, big up! (And apologise for asking where in Spain you were from, you are so clearly Italian!)

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Edging dangerously close to that familiar food coma and the inevitable meat-sweats we finished off the evening with Zelman Meats take of the espresso Martini – a Tainted Love – creamier than its cousin but still packing the same intense caffeine kick we needed to jerk ourselves out of our slump and off out to enjoy the rest of our Friday night…

The Burp Blog’s verdict: Four out of Five Forks

Price: £££ (approx. £68 per person, inc. drinks and service)

The Burp’s Top Tip: Get a reservation online and make sure to try all the cuts available – add to your steak knowledge!

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